Sleepless

by Grey Gordon

supported by
/
  • Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.

     name your price

     

1.
03:46
2.
04:12
3.
03:15
4.
5.
02:29
6.
02:48
7.

about

This record was recorded in several grueling late night sessions over the winter of 2011/2012 with Matt Riefler at Digitracks Studio. We slept less than any humans should.

Currently available in cassette form as a benefit for the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation: softspeakrecords.storenvy.com/products/877207-grey-gordon-sleepless-cassette

credits

released August 12, 2012

Recorded/Mixed/Mastered by Matt Riefler
All Songs Written/Performed by Grey Gordon
Drums by Brandon Wynn
Tambourine by Kyle Dawalt
Funded by Tony B., Dan Kinnaley and the Federal Government
Art by Tyler Axtell

tags

license

all rights reserved

feeds

feeds for this album, this artist

about

Grey Gordon Fort Wayne, Indiana

contact / help

Contact Grey Gordon

Streaming and
Download help

Track Name: Failings
Can you tell me when having conviction
Became cliche and so passe
And pointing fingers is never my intention
I know it must come off that way
I'm just confused at what the fuck happened to you
And why you just gave up
And why I'm injured by everything you do
And why it hurts so much

I'm totally overwhelmed with disbelief

Let's talk about how you always manage
To make me feel less secure
And how I never really take advantage
Of time alone to sort this out
And how these blues are cunning and contagious
They spread me out like a disease
And how you keep me scribbling on pages
Writing you between my lines

I'm totally overwhelmed with disbelief\

Every time I think of this
It makes me sick to think I missed
My chance to save you from yourself
This world and everybody else
It's hard to have to realize how
The shot you had is fucked up now
And it's my fault for giving up
And losing hope, abusing love
I know that I abandoned you
You're every bit of sleep I lose
I'm human but it's no excuse
For all the things I didn't do
Track Name: Circular
You're all fucked up on pills again
And it's only 8pm
Running back to the alley to be alone
So nobody will know
You can barely speak and it's starting to show
I think it's time to take you home
I feel alone, I am alone

Sitting on your couch we try to speak
Incoherently
I kiss you anyway, you taste like smoke
And pharmacy
Six months ago you changed your name
And me I am to blame
I feel ashamed, I am ashamed

I've gotten old, I've gotten ancient
But no wiser
You lost your tact, I lost my patience
And we expired
It's useless searching for a cause
It is no factor
We never cared for linear
I think the love came after

I'm underneath the floor again
The metaphor is prim
Feeling heavy with a weight beyond my years
Is this what youth fears
Cataclysm could be the right word
I don't mean to sound absurd
But it feels deserved, it is deserved

I think I lost you to the world
After all you're just a kid
How can I expect you still to care
What, for all the good it did
Six months from now we'll both be old
At least that's what I'm told
I feel annulled, I've been annulled

I've gotten old, I've gotten ancient
But no wiser
You lost your tact, I lost my patience
And we expired
It's useless searching for a cause
It is no factor
We never cared for linear
I think the love came after
Track Name: Lost Cause
These days I don't feel quite myself
It hurts to breathe and nothing helps
The pieces never seem to fit
They break and trickle from my grip

Feels like I'm running out of time
Spent up with death not far behind
I could keep running my whole life
And I would never see the light

I am half the man you think I am
I'm sorry if you were deceived
But I'm not who you should believe in
That's one thing you need to believe

These days I've give up on change
'Cause every change just feels the same
I'm left with nothing much to show
The truth is nothing much to know

They never warn you when you're young
How easily we come undone
How loneliness can kill the soul
The loneliness of growing old

I am half the man you think I am
I'm sorry if you were deceived
But I'm not who you should believe in
That's one thing you need to believe
Track Name: Firestorm (Earth Crisis)
Street by street, block by block.
Taking it all back.
The youth's immersed in poison
Turn the tide counterattack.
Violence against violence,
let the roundups begin.
A firestorm to purify
the bane that society drowns in.
No mercy, no exceptions,
a declaration of total war.
The innocents' defense
is the reason it's waged for.
Born addicted,
beaten and neglected.
Families torn apart,
destroyed and abandoned.
Children sell their bodies,
from their high they fall to drown.
Demons crazed by greed
cut bystanders down.
A chemically tainted
welfare generation.
Absolute complete
moral degeneration.
Born addicted,
beaten and neglected.
Families torn apart,
destroyed and abandoned.
Children sell their bodies,
from their high they fall to drown.
Demons crazed by greed
cut bystanders down.
Corrupt politicians, corrupt enforcement,
drug lords and dealers all must fall.
The helpless are crying out.
We have risen to their call.
A firestorm to purify.
Track Name: Exhausted
What the hell am I trying to accomplish
Wasting words about a girl I know could not care less
I'll name loneliness the accomplice
I feel the pull of time and it's frightening, I confess

So here's the last signal I'm sending out
Consider addressed to
All the things we used to sit and dream about
Back when my hopefulness impressed you
And youth was more than just a petty thing
If we said it then we meant it
In our innocence we fucked up everything
We never could've kept it

I'm so fed up with resignation
I swear I'm sorry, I'm just not quite sure what for
It may just sound like desperation
Maybe it is, but can you blame me anymore

So can it all just be forgiven now
Go back to being golden
Or have we simply just forgotten how
To struggle and to hold on
Do I have nothing left to offer you
Can you tell me where I lost it
Can love just not do what I want it to
Is the fantasy exhausted
Track Name: Sanka
I've spent too many days alone to remember
How I've made it through these 21 Decembers
How I've passed the years with no luck on my side
Can I make it out of this alive

I've spent too much time on things that don't matter
Stumbling over everything but what I'm after
And I've forgotten how it feels to walk with pride
I don't think I'll make it out of this alive

I've never had the strength to stand up on my own
I've built up walls, but it's no place to call a home
But if you stand by me, we'll make each other strong
We'll breathe for one another
We'll keep pushing on
Pushing on
Track Name: For One I Used To Love
Not sure why I've been missing you lately
Maybe it's the rain or the changing of the leaves
I can't help wondering if you still hate me
Or has my better half gladly forgotten me

Do you ever hear the messages I'm sending
In your heart am I still worthy of the blame
And do you honestly believe I was pretending
Wasn't that love when I was calling out your name
In the end

Could this really be my destiny
To wake up next to girls who are not you
When you don't even think of me
I can't help but to think it may be true
After all is said and done
I still miss you

There's always something in the changing of the seasons
This fall is finding me a couple steps behind
I'm still uncertain if this memory's worth keeping
Could it be you only lived inside my mind
The whole time

And if it's true that I am better off without you
Then why I am no better off than I've always been
And why is every song I write about you
Why do I smell you every time that I breathe in

Could this really be my destiny
To wake up next to girls who are not you
When you don't even think of me
I can't help but to think it may be true
After all is said and done
I still miss you